Ghosted After Salary Negotiation

Job SearchMoney

Oct 22

There’s no doubt that ghosting is one of the most frustrating things a job-seeker can endure. It’s everywhere. You’re ghosted after being phone screened and promised the next steps. You’re ghosted after promising interviews only to see the job re-posted with no explanation.

But have you ever been ghosted after you’ve begun a salary negotiation after receiving an offer?

A Salary Coach client came to me recently, excited about promising interviews. The company was a start-up and cash-poor, as many startups are. The young CEO wanted his deep marketing experience to help the venture succeed but was offering guaranteed pay (salary) well below my client’s walk-away number. So he offered a reasonable compromise that would recognize the CEO’s constraints while offering more cash based on milestone achievements.

The CEO said, “That sounds good. I’ll be back in a few days with a revised offer.”

And then.

Ghosted.

He never heard from that CEO again, even after graceful follow-ups.

This is rare, but it’s still a terrifying prospect. So let’s take a moment to talk about why this might happen and what you might be able to do to minimize this risk.

Why Do Employers Ghost Candidates After Salary Negotiations

There are many possible explanations for why an employer may ghost you during the negotiation process, so I’ll offer a few possibilities to explain what may have happened.

Before I go into explanations though, I need to say this: I don’t condone any of these behaviors. As a Recruiter and Recruiting Leader who has overseen 75,000 job offer negotiations in my career, please understand that I’m explaining, not condoning. I find this behavior to be cowardly and unprofessional. But it still exists, and this is why it happens.

So, let’s go.

Perceived Rejection of Offer

They believe you rejected their best offer. Since you didn’t accept their offer and instead decided to negotiate, they may view this as your “no,” and this can happen if they feel they’ve made you their best possible offer already, leading them to sidestep any confrontation or argument with you.

Business Uncertainties

Unforeseen developments within the company may prompt a reevaluation of the position’s viability. employers may elect to withhold information, a discourtesy to say the least. It is possible they just found out they are being acquired, the Hiring Manager just got fired, or some awful thing happened and they are afraid to explain. Whether due to an impending acquisition or a managerial shakeup,

Revealing Undesirable Traits

Negotiating poorly or exhibiting discourteous behavior can precipitate a change of heart on the employer’s part.

A recent anecdote underscores the ramifications of such missteps.

A CFO friend recently told me a story about a candidate his CEO just interviewed. This was a privately held company (so no stock), and the candidate demanded a $200,000 base salary plus an equity (ownership) stake in the business. Given that this was a family business, there was never going to be an equity stake on the table.

The CEO asked what it would take to close the deal without an equity stake. The candidate indicated a $250,000 package would get a deal done. After a couple of days, the CEO returned and offered the $250k package.

The candidate said, “I’ve been thinking. Make it 280, and we have a deal.”

The candidate just moved the goalposts, showing a shocking lack of integrity.

The offer was withdrawn. The Head of HR explained to the candidate that the offer was being withdrawn. The candidate tried to argue and offered to accept the $250,000 package, but it was too late. The damage was done.

In that case, the candidate did not get ghosted. But it is very possible the CEO could have been so offended that he said, “Well, to hell with that guy” and refused to engage further. He could have been ghosted and would never have known why.

An Awkward Reference

This happens occasionally. You’re in the middle of negotiating an offer, and the Hiring Manager decides before she accepts the higher-than-expected price, that she wants to be bullet-proof-sure that you’re going to succeed. So she calls some of her business contacts. And she hears something that makes her uncomfortable.

So, instead of explaining the awkward truth and burning her trusted informants, she will simply unplug and stop returning your messages. And… you’re ghosted.

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Are Candidates More Likely to Be Ghosted After Negotiating Salary

It is very unlikely that you’ll be ghosted after starting a negotiation if you start it in the right way. At Salary Coach, I teach professionals how to have a collaborative negotiation, not an oppositional one, and this greatly reduces your risk. But if you are demanding, issuing ultimatums, or misunderstanding your leverage, you’re playing a dangerous game.

It’s far more likely that the communication loop will be broken earlier in the process. At the offer stage, they are down to one candidate: you. Earlier, they have many to deal with, and communication is often cut for several reasons.

Someone is Ahead of You

In the phone screen and interview stages, for example, you might be ghosted because there are candidates ahead of you in the process, yet they don’t want to cut you loose. You’re the Plan B. They don’t want to tell you this because they don’t want to offend you or deal with conflict. Yet somehow, they think that ghosting you is not discouraging or offensive.

Unexpected Delays

The Hiring Manager hasn’t been responsive or isn’t making timely decisions. Someone went on vacation. The Recruiter doesn’t want to show their client in a negative light or they are juggling a million things, so procrastination wins out.

How Do You Know If You’ve Been Ghosted After a Salary Negotiation

Once you’ve been selected, companies are usually quite eager to close the offer, gain your acceptance, and move on to other priorities. So if you begin a negotiation, and suddenly you’re hearing crickets… You’ve emailed 5 or 6 times, you’ve called, and over the course of a week, you’ve heard nothing, it’s possible you’re being ghosted.

What Should You Do If You’ve Been Ghosted After A Salary Negotiation

If it has been a week since you’ve heard anything and you’re becoming concerned, I would recommend that you don’t express your anger. Not yet. Instead, leave kind messages that are understanding.

Sample Message If You Think You’ve Been Ghosted

“Hey Michelle, it’s John. I sent over some ideas on how we could come together on the salary, and I haven’t heard anything back from you. I’m very open to a conversation on this, but I know you’re busy. If I haven’t heard back from you by Wednesday, I’ll call again.”

Remember that you don’t know why there is a gap in communication. You’re trying to restore it, not express your anger. Invite them back into a conversation with you. Show them that you are forgiving and understanding. Once you have the conversation restored, you can discover if you’ll want to join that company or not, depending on the situation.

How to Avoid Being Ghosted After Salary Negotiations

The best way to avoid being ghosted after salary negotiation begins is to be collaborative, friendly, and understanding throughout every salary discussion. Use their desire for you to pull them along, but don’t be pushy or demanding.

Many people refuse to negotiate at all because they fear being turned down or ghosted. And as a result, far more people leave money on the table. Sometimes, it’s a lot of money.

In the Salary Coach Academy, I teach people how to reduce risk in these conversations, adopt a collaborative approach, identify and use leverage (gently), and get the best possible offer a company will reasonably give.

A negotiation does not have to be high-conflict, risky, or oppositional. You can still be nice and win big in your salary negotiation.

Ghosted After Salary Negotiation Recommended Reading

Ghosted After a Job Offer [What’s Next and How to Prevent It]

How to Negotiate A Sign On Bonus

Should You List Salary on a Resume

Contributor: John Gates

John Gates is the Founder of Salary Coach and a former Head of Global Recruitment for multiple Fortune 500 Companies. John has a combined 30+ years of corporate recruiting experience and has negotiated over 75,000 salary packages during his time. John teaches the Salary Coach Academy on Optim Careers, a complete educational program on how to negotiate salary using a low-risk, high-reward technique.